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To imagine her saying, "I'm here for you baby." We all need more than the . Once the humiliation of being in a loveless marriage is confronted, it can be accepted and even result in a long-term relationship. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. And which case, most would be use safe sex and if thy got pregnant, they would try for an abortion. Yes, her hormones will be out of whack. Features: Kris Fluffy named herself aptly - "fluffy" because she says she doesn't shave a single hair on her body. She actually is (5 months now), but I took all the words back (the reasons why I didn't want to be with her). 9 min read. I wish I wasn't pregnant by him. A year has passed, we have a beautiful little girl that I love with all my heart, but our marriage life is a disaster. Why can't you go back to doing what you were doing before you met? Apparently that first year of raising the child is very stressful, specifically on the relationship. U r runnin away from marriage cos u didn love her b4 ?? It does make someone feel down and stressed out but, look at the big picture. A friend of mine just had a kid w/ someone 1-2 weeks before meeting his current GF (who he loves but is probably leaving him over this - who can blame her?) As to my ex yes she is into me, we where together for over 9 years, this current relationship is just 10 months old! It was ok if we didn't want to be together. 2Face. It was required that women felt their decreased desire was significantly lower than that of their partner's. The authors interviewed 15 women between the ages of 25 and 59. I even feel guilty saying this considering how hard other couples are trying to have a child and can't. AND NOW EVERY ONE IS UPHAPPY, MISARABLE, INCLUDING THE CHILD. The "baby blues" are a form of depression - just not as severe as PPD. Single. People reports the famous couple's "miracle baby"-a daughter-was born Wednesday, Nov. 7, via surrogate. You said you quit your job Is that because of the pregnancy? Noooo you have to marry and then spend the rest of your lives in hell with someone you slept with? Having a baby can create a bond that encourages mature personal growth and strengthens a couple's commitment to each other -- but that doesn't happen overnight, and more often, it doesn't. But there's a catch: Because you believe that having this child means more to you than not having this child means to your husbandand because he had originally agreed to three kidsyour. The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. Saturday 4 Mar 2023 10:00 am. as expected the women are been overly sentimental, ganging up on the guy insulting, and throwing reason out the window. My current girlfirend got pregnant while on the mini pill. Start off by talking about your family, how you're feeling about work and home in general, and your love for your wife. YOU GOT THIS! I do love her a lot as a person but i am not in love with her. I know that my kids love us both. What kind of advice do you really want, the best advice would be to take care of your baby, dont let yours and your other half (lool) silly selves to pollute her upbringing. I'm in love with a married man And his wife is pregnant. Also my ex is unlikely to have children which in her case actually doesn't matter to me. Long story short: we've togheter Long distance girlfriend pregnant and is thinking about breaking up. Made a mistake without any intention to make it surely will freak someone out. It's his car, it's not petty if he keeps it. Men don't have a biological clock in the same sense as women. I want to love this baby, but I can't shake how I feel. You need to discuss with him so that you won't need to face the how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby alone. Unless your girlfriend deems fine that you both do not continue the relationship, by all means.". If you don't, pursuing. I sacraficed my needs for them. He's controlling. Many things will change during the whole 9 months of pregnancy. I too got burned with the kid trap. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. Sometimes people make choices to abort, adopt, or keep the child. To start? Amazed how women can be on these forums. 2005-2023Everyday Health, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. She has done nothing wrong and I feel I am just going to destroy her life! Last updated on June 9, 2022 by Michelle Devani There are many things that may cause a broken heart. This is why friends with benefits is never a good idea. Are these issues still there? . So are you guys in a relationship or just friend with benefits? The problem I have now is that have a beautiful baby girl with one girl I impregnated whom I dont love. Being pregnant isn't an excuse to work not work, I worked up until I was 38 weeks along by choice. Babies can put stress on a couple because it requires both mom and dad to give of themselves. Ex My moving on process. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think. I was By entering this site you declare He pays for the stuff bc he can afford too and didn't want me working while pregnant which was fine when everything was good. We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. Find out to see whether he actually likes you by taking this quick free quiz. You will need to know on how to get a Taurus man make a decision due to your current situation. Note that once you confirm, this action cannot be undone. Most were married to . AND THE END OF THE DAY IS ALSO HERS. This educational content is not medical or diagnostic advice. The issue is she is healthcare prof and works in OBS/GYN so there is no way way she would have an abortion, she has just been involved in too many such procedures and its just not for her. The way you speak to yourself has a lot to do with the way you view your situation. It tears me apart. My ex won't come back to me after I hurt h Ex girlfriend is pregnant with her new boyfriend months after breaking up with me. Is it okay for you to feel down all the time thinking about the mistake you did? I love my daughter and i care about my wife but there is no love on my end. Rightfully so! Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. But I don't feel the need to hold that up as a shield (though every time I see a movie where the childless woman is the villain I understand why my fellow non-parents doth protest too much . Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. The transition from being a couple to having a baby and becoming parents is an exciting, empowering, and life-changing experience. When I did he the. I know this is not the time to criticise as the harm has already been caused, but i will still ask: If you claim you dnt love someone, how on earth did u get involved with her, let alone put her in the family way? Whether the mistake were made with or without your intention, it still your mistake anyway. What are the reasons for not wanting to be with her? But we started fighting more and more. sit the lady down n explain things to her and the most important thing is take very good care of your child. And you will also need to take a firm decision on what you think is best to be done. If you're still contemplating having a family, you're still young enough to have that luxury. we ended u divorcing in 6 years anyway. back out now, "Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. I pretended to be. Sorry for the long story, but I wanted to give you an example of how the other side of things could go. I want to be a father!!! Sorry I must've misread. Now she's pregnant. She may have decided against an abortion thinking you will still be with her, but if not, TELL HER it is over and you will not be involved with her anymore (except of course whatever involvement you ahve with the child, support and custody-wise). Think about it if you can't love him ever then end it and learn to co parent. bumboclaath mi nuh hv any advice fi u.battybwoy! I just need to vent and I thought this would be a good place to do it. Couldn't have said it any better And me too guys. What can I do please? My boyfriend cheated on me with his baby mama and now she is pregnant but I still love him HELP!! But the decision that you take will not only have an impact in your life, but in others people's life too. The stories of council-flat, benefit scrounger single mums are so far-fetched. I know most of yall are gonna tell me to leave him and I wish it was that easy. Told me "**** the baby" I was gone for a while after that but went back due to having no where else to go. Shy behavior A woman who is in love with you will start to be unusually shy. You're a dude she just met, maybe at a bar, maybe on a dating site. Immerse yourself in nature. When he acts OK with the idea and his first instinct is to be happy, you can be sure it's one of the big signs a man wants to have a baby with you. Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). She doesn't want an abortion, and I know it sounds terrible but I keep hoping she will miscarry, however she is 16weeks gone and that's unlikely . Call your old boss, call family and friends, research aid and stop telling yourself you're stuck. Is anyone in the same situation. I've been trying to put my pride/ego/whatever aside and be with her, but it really kills me. In the time that I got pregnant I feel that I was in a daze thinking I was in love but recently I feel like I snapped out of it. If you just dont see it working it is better to do it now. This after-pregnancy condition is common, with roughly 70 to 80 percent of new mamas experiencing some degree of sadness. Keep looking down and feeling like you don't deserve something good won't get you anywhere. Take a time to learn from your mistake so that you won't fall into the same problem. He's provided for me financially, has given me a house and a car, and is really into being a father. Life will not be easier staying with him. What now? Op: get a job and support yourself. With the lowest fertility rate in the . As a matter of fact, there are many mental, emotional, and social side effects associated with being a young-faced woman. Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. Well of course he would keep the car. Might not happen overnight but think of where you want to see yourself in a year. Archived discussions are usually a bit older and not as active as other community content. 15) His biological clock is ticking. HERE YOU GIVE A CHANCE FOR THE MOTHER, THE CHILD, THE FATHER AND THE GIRLFRIEND AT HAPPINESS IN LIFE. woman in labor woman giving birth Sort by: Most popular Woman with newborn baby Pretty woman holding a newborn baby in her arms What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. and our The way you wrote that sounds like you think what a man wants is not as important as what a woman wants. If you're dating a woman who doesn't want to have kids, you should know whether or not you do. @jessi, how come i never get to meet these kind of guys,i swear i would have cut off your stupid sausage,put in the toilet and flush it off nonsence, @jessi, maame plz its rude to cut sumones sausage.sincerely the fault might come from the gal,maybe she did self arrangement ahohyehy3.and resulted in the pregnancy. no wonder we have the type of problems we have in our communitieswe are always reacting instead of thinking.. you cant correct a mistake or problem with another people.. Hair. CLARITY friend you do make a lot of sense. Eventually I grew to love him, but not the fairy tale kind of love. I grew up where my dad treated me like ****, so I wanted to be the best father I could. You moved into his house, you let him buy you a car and you quit your job because he was financial there. Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. There are midnight feedings, changing diapers, rocking a screaming infant and little sleep. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. I'm a **** if I lie and say I love her and be with her. But men can still get baby fever. He nearly killed you. It wasn't working out before she got pregnant and now it's 100x worse because of her hormones. If you've only been together 3 mos, where did you live before you met? So here's the long story short My pregnant girlfriend hates me and keeps pushing me away! We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. Group Leaders arent expected to spend any additional time in the community, and are not held to a set schedule. Being pregnant is not a free pass for not working. I am a single mom and have been for a few years- however, my first child was planned with my fiance' and we were madly in love and it was the greatest, happiest time of my life. We didn't have to be. ( though I dont see the first one as a mistake because making babies should not be a mistake.it is the natural order of things).you cant force people to do things out of their wishes and desires. After having a baby, a woman will be, on average, 2.5 to 5 lbs. For all the guys out there who think a woman is the stepping stone to the next onewear a condom. Good one boys real mature!! The baby grew in her, she birthed it, she fed it, and she nurtured it every step of the way. One in 4 women will hang onto 11 lbs. Nothing from the start. On the other hand, if you do not love her but only want the child, it is also very selfish of you. If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. Sure, most couples are madly "in love" at first, but as time goes on I think most people who have been married 10, 20, 50+ years will say that love is first a choice and then feelings follow and there are some hard times when the feelings are not there and all you are left with is the choice to show love to this person. My only advice is to make sure you don't make your or your wife or your baby's life miserable. He made a baby with you but doesn't seek out or make an effort to spend time with his daughter. Please specify a reason for deleting this reply from the community. I hope everything works out for you. But there's something extraordinary about the energy level of a little boy. BE A MANam done. We are two total opposite people. Time passed and we just got comfortable being there. Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade have welcomed their first baby to their family. Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. It's why your lady friend just said those two possibly thrilling, possibly terrifying words: "I'm pregnant." So what do you say when the woman you. Knowing that you don't want to have the relationship with someone, you will never be able to fake your feelings for temporary happiness. If you don't like something about your life, MAKE A CHANGE. More answers below Quora User Managing Partner (Solicitor) & Mechanical Engineer Author has 20.3K answers and 10.7M answer views 1 y Personally, I think you should only have sex with people you are in love with. I didn't want to waste one more day of my life feeling empty and with someone I didn't even like. THEN, MAYBE THEY BREAK UP CUZ THEY CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. First, she's too far along. He's not in love so he's selfish??? Everyone has their reasons for doing things and it's not up to us to judge them. And beware if your list of reasons is merely a hollow echo of your partner's. 3. Add to Collection. I was supposed to be the one. Do not be with someone you don't want to be with. Obviously she is going to get custody if we split up. Its best to rip the band-aid off now instead of living a miserable life indefinitely. My greatest concern is the child. You wouldn't happen to be burning a bra right about now would you? No one can tell you what to do, we all have different stories. You can't force yourself to love him. Thank you for purchase! I unfortunately love my ex I have tried to forgets my ex but I can't. My girlfriend is pregnant and suddenly i realize that she may not be all i ever wanted. You need to be upfront and honest nothing is worse than being lied to when feelings are involved. As I read the last couple lines I typed, I sound so selfish. After I really got to know him without drinking and partying, I found out I didn't like his personality. THAT'S IT. I know quite a few mothers who weren't ready (not that anyone ever is) to have a baby when they did and just grew to resent their child. We had been dating for maybe a few months before exclusive. Privacy Policy. This educational content is not medical or diagnostic advice. BE RESPOSIBLE MAKE SURE TO BE THERE FOR THE CHILD. Sex can lead to pregnancy and I'm assuming you knew the possibility of pregnancy when you made the choice. If you don't want to be controlled, don't make yourself 100% dependent on someone.